But not all was bad as 2011 saw the reemergence of Common and Robin Thicke, gave us INCREDIBLE laughter at Ray J’s expense, and gives us something to look forward to as we now embark on 2012.

Y’all know the routine by now, let’s start this off with the most controversial category!

Most Disappointing Album of the Year

Drake – Take Care – Are we done yet? No? God DAMN!

M.O.P. – Sparta – While this album was by no means wack, it wasn’t overly dope either. For 11 years, we’ve been waiting for that definitive album, that definitive single, that definitive banger. The production on Sparta was flat, so much so that the album sounded like it was 2-tracked.

Jay-Z & Kanye West – Watch The Throne –Talk about a shit turd of an album. Holy shit this album was horrible and I don’t care what anyone thinks about that. Kanye proved, once again, that he’s the corniest rapper of all time. And Jay-Z? He took more plays off on this album than Randy Moss in Minnesota.

Danny Brown – XXX – I’m fully prepared for the backlash I’m going to get for this but it is what it is. The first half of XXX was chocked full of empty rhetoric and punchlines just for the sake of punchlines. The second half of the album was solid. Overall, the album left me disappointed because of how high Danny has set the bar with previous releases such as The Hybrid and the Detroit State Of Mind mixtape series. The production also left me scratching my head on a lot of the tracks.

The Cool Kids – When Fish Ride Bicycles – Here’s to hoping that we won’t see another TCK album in 2012. Not that they’re weak, but this album was anything but audible. The thing about The Cool Kids is that they’ve waited so long to capitalize off of their buzz that they inspired a whole generation of new artists. A generation of new artists that have taken their niche and do it better than they do.

Snoop Dogg – Doggumentary – Snoop, for the love of God, please stop.

Lupe Fiasco – Lasers – There has always been one bright spot in Lupe’s career – his music. If you can get past his arrogance in his every day speech as if he’s better and smarter than everyone, his music was the catalyst for greatness. Then he dropped the shit turd of the year.

Winner: Jay-Z & Kanye West – Watch The Throne and Lupe Fiasco – Lasers

Video of the Year

Cold Men Young – Time Bomb – Talk about a video that’s not only aesthetically dope but completely fits the theme of the song in a unique way! Cold Men Young did just that with the video for, “Time Bomb.”

The Black Opera – Villains – The Black Opera, whoever the hell they are, dropped one of the most powerful videos of the year. The symbolism in the video is amazing!

Mayer Hawthorne – The Walk – An amazing video from an amazing artists, Mayer Hawthorne put a musical bed to a Mr. & Mrs. Smith themed movie.

Hawdwerk & Jansport J – Respect – The West Covina duo of emcee Hawdwerk and producer Jansport J dropped a stirring video to a musical backdrop depicting how black youth are often caught up in the destructive cycle of their surroundings.

RenCen CoolBeanz – Bad Ass – If you’re not familiar with RenCen, don’t worry. You will be soon!

Pusha T – Trouble On My Mind feat. Tyler The Creator – It’s no secret that I’m what you would call the polar opposite of a Tyler, The Creator/OFWGKTA fan but dope is dope no matter who it’s from and this song/video was dope.

Clear Soul Forces – Strangers In The Night – The four man duo of Clear Soul Forces made some huge waves in 2011. The visuals for Strangers In The Night were crazy!

Winner: The Black Opera – Villains

Movie of the Year

The Hangover Part II – To be the sequel of one of the funniest comedies of our time, Part II didn’t disappoint. While most people point out that the plot was the same as the first, I say to them: What the fuck did you expect? Idiot.

Transformers: Dark Of The Moon – Yo, Transformers 3 was dope. Screw you guys!

Fast Five – Yo, Fast Five was dope. Screw you guys! I’ll off myself if they end up making a part 6, though.

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol – Good ‘ol Tom Cruise took some time off from worshipping space aliens in the hills of Los Angeles to bring some of that good ‘ol crazy magic he has to the big screen.

30 Minutes Or Less – Although I was hoping Aziz Ansari would have been funnier in this movie, the movie was hilarious none the less.

50/50 – This movie did an amazing job on riding the fine borderline of comedy and drama. It tugged at the emotional strings while keeping you in stitches.

Bad Teacher – Cameron Diaz is back! Wow, she NAILED this role.

Winner: Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol

“Where You At?” Award for Best Disappearing Act

Ted Williams – Yo, what in the ENTIRE fuck happened to Ted Williams?

Charlie Sheen – Had a spark when you started but now you just garbage. #WINNING!

2 And A Half Men – Had a spark when you started but now you just garbage. #TIGERBLOOD

Kat Stacks – Wasn’t she being deported?

Winner: Ted Williams

Concert/Event of the Year

Royce Da 5’9” album release for Success Is Certain – I’m not biased to Detroit artists and events but if you’re familiar with just how stagnant local progress can be in Detroit then you know it’s an amazing thing to see Detroit come out to pack a 2k + venue for a local artist. They did that for Royce. It was an amazing night, packed with everything from a surprise performance by Bun B and Slaughterhouse to Paul Rosenberg presenting Royce with his Gold plaque for Bad Meets Evil.

Brooklyn Hip Hop Festival – Q-Tip took over the BK Hip Hop Festival 2011 and really made it his own. What an amazing idea the Brooklyn Bodega had to have Q-Tip headline and run through his rich catalog of music and inviting everyone from Kanye West to Busta Rhymes to rock the stage with him.

Paul Rosenberg’s PR40 Birthday Celebration – The much publicized 40^th birthday celebration for the man who has helped introduce Detroit Hip Hop to the world’s eye. The evening was chocked full of special guest performances from the likes of Nas, Rakim, EPMD, Craig G, and Dana Dane.

eLzhi’s album release for eLmatic – Like Royce’s album release party for Success Is Certain, Detroit came in record numbers to celebrate the release of eLZhi’s album release party for eLmatic. It was truly a great thing to see.

Winner: Brooklyn Hip Hop Festival

“Where They Do Dat At?” Excellence in Ignorance Award

Kwame Kilpatrick – How does this jackass continue to make the news?

T.I. – T.I. is the ONLY person on Earth who can go BACK to jail because of the way he went HOME from jail. It’s not funny, but it’s so fucking hilarious!

Arnold Schwarzenegger – Congratulations, it’s an 18 year old Mexican boy!

The Jury in the Casey Anthony Trial – You’ve GOT to be fucking kidding me!

Gucci Mane – Ice cream cone on the face, huh? Dude likes cream on his face, huh?

Rappers STILL having sex with Kat Stacks in 2011 – SMH!

Winner: The Jury in the Casey Anthony Trial

“N*gga, Please!” Award of the Year

Herman Cain – Perhaps the worst thing to happen to me in 2011 was finding out this African baboon footed sambo coon was my 3^rd or 4^th cousin. Everything about his Presidential campaign was a joke.

Canibus – From Twitter slander to Royce Da 5’9” and former group mate Ras Kass from a page he claims was a fake page to verbally attacking J. Cole for the way he gave him praise. Really? Are you serious? Nigga you should be happy anyone even knows your name these days!

The Entire Tea Party – Really? These people are a joke and a slap in the face to democracy. The scary part is all of the people they’ve inspired to ignorance.

Ray J – MONEY TEAM! Right now, Ray J is outside of Fabolous’ house with 50 Toyota Prius’. #MONEYTEAM

Winner: Ray J

“o_O” Award for Worst Line of the Year

Kanye West on Niggas In Paris – “What’s Gucci my nigga?//What’s Louie my killa?//What’s drugs my deala?//What’s that jacket, Margiela?” What in the letter-f, ampersand, asterisk, k does that even mean?

Kanye West on Niggas In Paris – “You know how many hot bitches I own?” What? You OWN people, now?

Kanye West on Gotta Have It – “Racks on racks on racks//Maybachs on bachs on bachs on bachs on bachs//…oh shit it’s just blacks on blacks on blacks.” SMH. Go fall on a blade.

Kanye West on Illest Motherfucker Alive – “Bullet proof condom when I’m in these hoes//Got staples on my dick (why?) fuckin’ centerfolds.” SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Kanye West on every verse – Look, I could make an entire Best (Worst) of 2011 blog based solely off weak ass Kanye lines so I’ll stop now.

Winner: Kanye West

Best New Artist – Hip Hop

Big KRIT – When Return Of 4eva dropped, I damn near lost my mind. I couldn’t believe that for the first time in YEARS, there was finally a legitimate new artist about to take over the game.

Kendrick Lamar – I’ll be honest, it took me a LONG time to warm up to Kendrick Lamar. I never thought he was weak, but I just wasn’t impressed. Then Section.80 came out but by that time all of the over-hype convoluted my viewpoint and I didn’t give it a fair shake. Once I DID give it a fair shake? Well, you’ll find out later as you continue to read.

J. Cole – Finally, we have a Roc Nation album release. For the half-assed promo and lack of attention to him by his label, J. Cole had a good year.

David Dallas – Back in January, I was introduced to the New Zealand emcee. Then his album – The Rost Tint – dropped and I’ve been spreading the word about him ever since.

Winner: Kendrick Lamar

Best Indie Label of the Year

Stones Throw – This year Stones Throw celebrated its 15^th year in business and saw all of their hard works with who is probably their highest selling artist in Mayer Hawthorne move on to the big leagues with a deal from Universal Republic. They’re definitely doing something right!

Duck Down Music – Duck Down had release after release this year, from Pharoahe Monch and Kidz In The Hall to teaming up with Statik Selektah’s Showoff Records imprint and 9^th Wonder’s Jamla Records imprint to release SO much quality in 2011.

Mello Music Group – Perhaps the most consistent label in Hip Hop, Mello is out here living life like a Denzel Washigton quote, “This shit’s chess, not checkers!”

Winner: Stones Throw

Producer of the Year

Hir-O – Hir-O continued his musical dominance in 2011 with the release of his instrumental LP, The Freakstrumental Joint.

14kt – As if 2010 wasn’t a great year for KT musically, he continued with the tradition of excellence in 2011. He dropped two instrumental albums this year and teamed up with Bun B for a track.

9^th Wonder – 9^th introduced the world to his label imprint Jamla Records in 2011, in addition to dropping quality joints of his own.

Winner: 14KT

Best Song of the Year

Common – Sweet – BAHAHAHAHAHAH! Man, I hate Drake!

Kendrick Lamar – Fuck Your Ethnicity – What a major fucking way to start off an album. WOW!

Common – Blue Sky – One of the game’s best singles this year.

Kendrick Lamar – Ronald Reagan Era – Kudos to Kendrick for getting the generation he inspires to actually get back into LYRICS and LYRICISIM. Not since 2Pac has someone with commercial aspirations been able to inspire with lyricism.

Kendrick Lamar – A.D.H.D. – 8 doobies to the face? Nigga, fuck that!

Young Jeezy – Way Too Gone feat. Future – I could care less about a Future but Jeezy went to work!

Moe Dirdee – We Know feat. Jamall Bufford – Holy shit! I’ve placed this track on about 4-5 mixtapes I’ve made in 2011 easily.

JYoung The General – We Got Ya – JYoung takes on the challenge of tearing down a smooth, 40’s-50’s inspired Rat Pack type of vibe laid down by StewRAT and creates a lyrically digestible, commercially viable single for everyone.

Big  Sean – Dance (Ass) – It’s no secret that I’m no fan of Big Sean but props have to be given where they are due. Sonically, his album was crafted perfectly and, “Dance (Ass),” is one of the year’s most addictive songs.

Lupe Fiasco – All Black Everything – Even on that shit tastic of an album, a little bit of the Lupe we used to love was able to shine through.

David Dallas – Caught In A Daze feat. Freddie Gibbs – When I’ve turned this track on, no one could believe that a white guy from New Zealand could have such a smooth, lyrical flow. David Dallas is that dude!

Jay-Z & Kanye West – Murder To Excellence – I’m surprised that one of the worst album of the year could produce such a quality song.

Winner: Moe Dirdee – We Know feat. Jamall Bufford

Mixtape of the Year

Jean Grae – Cookies Or Comas – It’s been a while since we were blessed with a full-length anything from Jean Grae so to hear her in her element on Cookies Or Comas was good for Hip Hop.

FowL – Live From The D – The next one up from Detroit, FowL opened the year with his debut mixtape Live From The D to RAVE reviews and coverage from everywhere.

FowL – Good Vibes – His 2^nd mixtape of 2011, FowL spazzed out on some of Hip Hop’s greatest instrumentals of the 90’s to create amazing music any hip hop head could vibe to.

Skyzoo – The Great Debater – Skyzoo is the fucking man. Hands down. Nothing else to say.

Kid Vishis – Sick Em Vol.2 – The baby brother of Royce Da 5’9”, Kid Vishis, has been showing the world he can more than stand on his own two feet – on Sick Em Vol.2 he stood on one foot while balancing the pressure of being kin to one of the greatest lyricists in the game.

Nametag – Classic Cadence 3 – The final installment in Nametag’s Classic Cadence series, Classic Cadence 3 perfectly displayed what the cousin of Black Milk is all about.

Winner: FowL – Good Vibes

Instrumental Album of the Year

Hir-O – The Freakstrumental Joint – There seems to be nothing this guy can’t do, and no type of beat he can’t make. Hir-O reached out to the ladies for this sensual stimulating effort that included more than just the beats but a complete visual experience.

Yungclassix – Life On The Grid – One of Detroit’s best kept secrets behind the boards, Yungclassix dropped his highly anticipated Life On The Grid in 2011. From Detroit to the UK, the response has been crazy!

14KT – 14killatape – Any time 14KT drops, it’s a good year.

14KT – A Friendly Game Of KT – TWO 14KT drops in a year?

Trebles And Blues – The Blue Note – In 2011, I was introduced to Trebles And Blues out of Los Angeles. Dude is SURGICAL with an MPC!

Winner: 14KT – A Friendly Game Of KT

Extended Play of the Year

JYoung The General – Black History Year: Installment 2 – Black History Year 2 is the second installment in the first EP series of its kind; a musical series paying homage to the history of an entire race through dope music. G-Unit in-house producer Nick Speed is back behind the boards for this one as JYoung delves into deeper subjects about Black History.

Bad Meets Evil – Hell: The Sequel – Everyone wanted this EP to be what THEY wanted it to be, completing negating the fact that it’s 2011 and not 2001. As Royce told me in the studio when he let me hear it, “I don’t even remember my verse to Scary Movie.” To hear these guys trade bars back and forth like old times – having complete disregard for commercial song structure – was AMAZING. These guys got in the booth for fun, made it an EP, completely disregarded conventional standards for a commercially viable project, and went Gold.

Black Milk & Danny Brown – Black And Brown – Danny Brown redeemed himself from the misses on XXX with the Black And Brown EP with Black Milk. This project had been rumored for a while but it was amazing to finally see it come to light!

Mobb Deep – Black Cocaine – Last year I asked the question, “Where the hell is Mobb Deep?” Welp, I’m guessing they heard me because Black Cocaine saw the duo reach back to some of those roots that got them to where they are now.

Slaughterhouse – The Slaughterhouse EP – Completely under the radar for most but Slaughterhouse dropped a free EP in 2011 that was better than a lot of people’s entire albums.

Zo! – Just Visiting Three – I’m not sure if Zo! considered Just Visiting Three an EP but I categorized it as so because of its length. Zo! is an AMAZING musician!

Winner: Bad Meets Evil – Hell: The Sequel

Album of the Year – R&B

Goapele – Break Of Dawn – Goapele can never do any wrong.

Robin Thicke – Love After War – Robin Thicke is on fire. From the Jesus sandals to the Tuxedo, he’s never released an album short of amazing!

Jill Scott – The Light Of The Sun – One of the best singers of our time, hands down.

Marsha Ambrosious – Late Nights And Early Mornings – If I could create a category for Marsha’s legs alone, I would. My God. Late Nights And Early Mornings made its way through the R&B AND the hip hop head scene.

Winner: Robin Thicke – Love After War

Album of the Year – Hip Hop

Royce Da 5’9” – Success Is Certain – Royce will never make that definitive crossover album and, to me, that’s what makes him so great and worthy of his spot in my top 5 of all time. Royce has the unique ability to evoke the masses via an underground means of communication and he does it better than anyone in the game ever has.

Big K.R.I.T. – Return Of 4eva – K.R.I.T. is the best artist out of the South since T.I. Hands down. And, until T.I. gets his act together, K.R.I.T. has the crown. Return Of 4eva was easily one of the greatest albums from a new artist in the past 10 years.

Kendrick Lamar – Section.80 – I’m truly glad I gave myself the opportunity to warm up to Section.80. The hype machine can be a dangerous beast in the eyes of a critic like myself.  Kendrick deserves every ounce of that hype, though. Another one of those albums by a new artist that one of the greatest of the past 10 years.

Common – The Dreamer, The Believer – It felt really good to get Common back from the edge of the cliff that Universal Mind Control put him on. Pharrell should be BARRED from stepping foot near ANY classic-status artist. This album is proof why Common is one of the top 10 Hip Hop artists of all time.

Young Jeezy – TM103: Hustlerz Ambition – Jeezy is an undeniable force for any urban individual. If you’re from the inner city, REALLY from the inner city, Jeezy resonates with you in a way any of your current sophistications can. I don’t care if you’re a Harvard Alumnus. I bet you Obama listens to TM103 everyday.

The Roots – Undun – The Roots can do no wrong. Ever.

eLZhi – eLmatic – Maybe it’s not that definitive eLZhi solo album we’ve been waiting for for so long, but it’s the closest we’re going to get for a while. The fact that eLZhi was able to take one of Hip Hop’s top 3 albums of all time, and COMPLETELY make it his own? Nothing short of amazing.

Winner: Kendrick Lamar – Section.80

Best Moment in Hip Hop

The Roots’ Michele Bachmann Intro Song – Holy crap, The Roots are amazing humans. God bless your souls!

Common dissing Drake – Clearly the best thing to happen in Hip Hop music all year.

A BET Award Show that was actually tolerable – Who woulda thunk it, huh? God bless you, Kevin Hart! And God bless you, Shady 2.0 Cypher!

Winner: The Roots’ Michele Bachmann Intro Song

Artist of the Year – R&B

Robin Thicke – Robin Thicke is one of the few artists that can step away for a period of time, come back, and reclaim his spot like he never left. He’s THAT good.

Marsha Ambrosious – It’s not often an R&B artist can really transcend the hard body Hip Hop scene and OWN it with making classic R&B music like she did. Goapele kinda did it with, “Closer.” Jill Scott CAN do it at times. Marsha Ambrosious DOES it.

Jill Scott – Truly an amazing talent, she’s another one of those artists who can step away and come back like she never left.

Mayer Hawthorne – People may not consider Mayer an R&B artist but I’ll be damned if he doesn’t continue to OWN the category. 2011 saw him transition from indie label success with Stones Throw to major label success with Universal Republic.

Winner: Mayer Hawthorne

Artist of the Year – Hip Hop

Danny Brown – One of the more polarizing artists in recent Hip Hop years, Danny Brown’s presence is undeniable. He’s been EVERYwhere in 2011 from Rolling Stone to Fader Magazine to the top of the charts for rap and rock magazines alike for XXX. While it may have not been that album for me, it definitely left its mark.

Kendrick Lamar – There’s no downplaying the amount of success that Kendrick Lamar has had in 2011. What Kendrick Lamar did for independent Hip Hop artists everywhere will have a lasting effect for years to come. There hasn’t been a new artist to dominate like him, with NO major label presence, in a long time. Now he has Dr. Dre committed to working on his next album. It’s his time.

Winner: Kendrick Lamar

Who/What To Be On The Lookout for in 2012…

Danny! – It’s ok if you don’t know who Danny! is yet because you will in 2012. Mark my words. You WILL know Danny Swain in 2012.

Slaughterhouse Album – From what I heard of the Slaughterhouse album in mid 2011 was nothing short of pure neck breaking euphoria. Early contender for 2012 album of the year.

Chell – The youngest member of the BLAT! Pack, Chell is poised for an amazing 2012. The young vocalist has already landed a handful of major label features, a potential tour, and is gearing up for the release of her debut EP – Coming Out My Chell. It’s going to be a great year for her.

Stryfe and Marc Byrd are The Last Resort – Trust me when I say that The Last Resort is going to break the mold of what Hip Hop can be sonically.

Red Pill x Hir-O – The Kick – The Kick WILL make SEVERAL top websites and publications favorite album of the year. This album is another one of those early contenders for 2012 album of the year.

Big K.R.I.T. – After dropping Return Of 4eva, I can’t wait to hear Big K.R.I.T.’s official Def Jam debut. Def Jam has the ball in their court – here’s to hoping they don’t dribble it off their foot and out-of-bounds.

The official WHUTUPDOE.COM SXSW Showcase – WHUTUPDOE.COM will be doing an (unofficial) SXSW Showcase this year. It ‘s going to be a BANGER!

Ketchphraze – This man already has THREE projects done and ready to go for 2012. After giving the Hip Hop world a taste of what he can do in 2011 leaking some of his tracks with eLZhi, Guilty Simpson, and others – he’s going to destroy 2012.

Vstylez – I don’t overhype things too often but Vstylez’ s album in 2012 WILL be in contention for album of the year. I’ve heard it several times – each time having pissed myself.

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It’s here, the album that didn’t leak before being released. Jay-Z and Kanye West‘s highly publicized album, Watch The Throne. Does it live up to the hype? Check out our live, unfiltered track-by-track thoughts as we listen to Watch The Throne.

1) No Church In The Wild feat. Frank Ocean (prod. Kanye West, Mike Dean & Ken Lewis)

Beat is ok, underwhelming at first. What is all of this average singing to start the song? An album called, “Watch The Throne, ” needs to start off with an epic BANG.

“Jesus was a carpenter, Yeezy makes beats//Hova flows, the homies go, “get the hell up out yo seats. Preach.” Well if that isn’t the most blasphemous shit I’ve heard in 2011, I don’t know what is. And Kanye is talking about forming new religions? Oh, ok.

All in all, a decent track. Not really what I expected to start the album, though. A flat way to start. And what the hell did the beat switch up to in the last few seconds? The fuck was that?

2) Lift Off feat. Beyoncé (prod. Kanye West, Mike Dean, Jeff Bhasker, Q-Tip & Don Jazzy)

First off, Beyonce’s wack and I don’t care how you feel about that. Now let’s actually talk about the track.

This beat… what the hell is it doing? Why is it so soft? It sounds like flash-dance meets hip hop meets snare.

Kanye, isn’t Beyonce singing on the track? Can we let HER do that, mediocrely (yeah, I made that word up)? Do YOU have to do it mediocrely as well? smh.

2 minutes in and I’d swear this was in the reject pile for My Beautiful Twisted Dark Fantasy.

“Lift off… (something unintelligible) Watch The Throne, get pissed off(?), Earth is (more unintelligible dribble) making my dick soft.” Really? I mean, I don’t expect anything from Jay-Z after he ear fucked us with cyanide on Blueprint 3 but REALLY? Did KANYE write that bar?

It hurts my heart to say that Beyonce is the best thing about this track.

3) Niggas In Paris (prod. Hit-Boy)

Really? That’s the name of the track, though?

Is that a Lex Luger piano roll????

Who the fuck is Hit-Boy?

“What’s Gucci, my nigga? What’s Louie, my killa? What’s drugs, my deala…” Kanye is the worst rapper that 2011 has seen.

“Doctors say I’m the illest, ’cause I’m sufferin from realness.” I couldn’t make these weak ass bars up if tried.

4) Otis feat. Otis Redding (prod. Kanye West)

Mediocrity at its best. AND IT’S NOT FEATURING OTIS REDDING, IT’S JUST A SAMPLE!

5) Gotta Have It (prod. The Neptunes)

Kanye: “I’ma need a day off, I think I call Ferris up,” Jay-Z: Bueller had a Mueller(?) but I switched it for a milli.” -__-

Jay-Z: “Tell me that yo daddy is, tell him I just want my racks,” Kanye: Racks on racks on raaaccks (Jay-Z ad-lib ‘racks!’)  Maybachs on bachs on bachs on bachs on baaaaaachs/oh shit, it’s just blacks on blacks on blacks.”  -____________-

Jay-Z: “I wish I could give you this feeling’, I’m planking on a million.”

I wish I could give YOU this feeling that I have… it hurts.

6) New Day (prod. RZA)

IS THAT AUTO-TUNE OVER A RZA BEAT? SMMFH. Didn’t Jay-Z make a song called, “Death Of Auto-Tune?” Ironically, it’s the best track on the album thus far.

7) That’s My Bitch (prod. Q-Tip & Kanye West)

Doesn’t Memphis Bleek have a song with a similar title?

What the hell is the beat doing? Is that African booty bass with tambourine over it? Outside of that, the track is eh.

8) Welcome To The Jungle (prod. Swizz Beatz)

Recycle snare, loop synthisized guitar sound, talk over chorus, ad-lib during verses, add three piano notes every 16 bars = Swizz Beatz. Got it!

9) Who Gon’ Stop Me (prod. Sham “Sak Pase” Joseph & Kanye West)

Kanye has some of the worst bars of all time. Corny mothaf*cka. Shoutout to him and whoever “Sak Pase” is taking this Flux Pavilion dubstep track and NOT doing anything but looping the sample.

The last minute of this track goes horribly wrong.

10) Murder To Excellence (prod. Swizz Beatz & Symbolyc One)

Alright, finally a track I’m not mad about at all. Can’t be mad at anything about this track. It only took the first ten tracks to get to that point, though.

Sarcasm.

Kanye still gets on his empty rhetoric bars at the end of the track. It’s who he is, he’ll never escape raps about nothing.

11) Made In America feat. Frank Ocean (prod. Sham “Sak Pase” Joseph)

SWEET BABY JESUS this beat is an 8-bit, Lionel Ritchie, “All Night Long,” knock off piece of cow stool. Oh, and more mediocre vocals from Frank Ocean.

“South Park had ‘em all laughin’, now all my niggas designing and we all swaggin’.” Gay fish is HILARIOUS, bro. Hilarious.

This chorus is SO blasphemous and has NOTHING to do with the verses OR THE TITLE of the song smh.

12) Why I Love You feat. Mr Hudson (prod. Mike Dean & Kanye West)

“I tried to teach niggas to be kings…” I’ma stop you right there, Jay-Z. And, no, I’m not going to let you finish lying on wax.

This beat can go to hell.

13) Illest Motherfucker Alive (prod. Southside & Kanye West) *

There’s nothing I would like more for Kanye‘s larynx to fall out of his neck. “Bulletproof condoms when I fuck these hoes.” WHAT?

Another mediocre at best beat.

14) H.A.M (prod. Lex Luger & Kanye West) *

Fuck everything about this track smh. It WAS all good just a week ago when Watch The Throne didn’t drop. Now I want to kill myself.

15) Primetime (prod. No I.D.) *

Some place, some WHERE, Deion Sanders is rolling over in his grave.

No I.D. took this play off.

16) The Joy f. Curtis Mayfield (prod. Pete Rock & Kanye West) *

Eh. Sounds like something that Freddie Gibbs would sound better suited on than Kanye West and Jay-Z.

Lazy sampling.

Lazier looping.

Synopsis: I feel sorry for those of you who bought tour tickets for this album. Good luck with that. Bottom line, you should have known how shitty and half-assed this album was going to be when that kaleidoscope/Microsoft Word Clip Art cover leaked. This is easily the weakest, wackest, most disappointing album of 2011 and possibly of the past 10 years. And probably will be for the NEXT 10 years.

Guess what’s going to happen, though? It’s going to sell like crazy as they both have given the royal middle finger to not only their fans but independent retailers across the world. There are just those class of people who are sheep. And that’s why…

To Jay-Z and Kanye, I say this: Everyone is now dumber for having listened Watch The Throne. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul(s). Or he could not have mercy on your souls, I’m good either way.

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POW!

via: Huffington Post

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February 18th, 2011 at Mac’s Bar in Lansing, Michigan. 9pm-2am $5 21 & up, $7 18+ with P2daHI and Red Pill.

February 19th, 2011 at The Bullfrog Bar & Grill in Redford, Michigan. 9pm-2am $5. Performing live in concert will be:
Street Justice
P2daHI
Kopelli of Cold Men Young
J.A.E.
Passalacqua (Blaksmith of Cold Men Young and Mister)
Red Pill

February 23rd at The Landshark in Lansing, Michigan from 9pm-2am with JYoung The General, The Amature, and Chell. Free admission, donations accepted.

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Let’s be real, this ENTIRE list could be consumed with a couple of phrases: Dirty South, Chopped & Screwed, Nelly, St. Lunatics, and Chingy. But allow me to delve deeper into it and really unearth some of the worst music of the past 10 years. I don’t expect you to agree with them all but, again let’s keep it real, the following music listed sucks balls. And deep down inside, you know it does.

Pras – Win Lose Or Draw: Are you serious? Pras, are you serious here? There wasn’t supposed to be a member of The Fugees that could do any wrong as a solo act. The Fugees were supposed to be above musical reproach. Welp, Pras definitely dispelled that notion. Talk about shit! I think this album is what Diddy is stepping in in the picture above. In fact, “Ghetto Superstar” is about the only remotely good things that Pras has ever done with his solo career.

And what’s with this “Pras Michel?” Oh, you fancy huh?

Amil – All Money Is Legal: Who’d have ever thought that a Roc-A-Fella in their prime album could be as bad as this  was? I mean, I understand Brothers From Another, 534, Roc-A-Fella Presents: Teairra Marie, and that horrible reggaetone phaze they went through but that was at the END of Roc-A-Fella as we knew it. All Money Is Legal came out at the prime of Roc-A-Fella’s talent boom and the top of their commercial boom. There was no way this album should have been as bad as it was, right? WRONG! The fact that Beyonce was on the lead single leads me to believe that this album was always set to be a disaster!

R. Kelly & Jay-Z: Yeah, they had more than one album and this signifies BOTH albums. You can’t put one of those albums here with out the other album. You just can’t. 2002 started the path of what would be two of the worst albums spanning across all genres of music and all periods of time. There isn’t a single thing from Best Of Both Worlds nor Unfinished Business that is salvageable. In fact, the ONLY thing salvageable about this unholy union of garbage was the extremely comical way that it ended. Jay-Z and R. Kelly coming to blows? Ha! It’s deeper than that. It was sabotage, espionage, and lives on the line! I guess the straw that broke the camel’s back (in this analogy, R. Kelly would be the straw since Jay-Z is always likened to Joe Camel), was their final show in New York where R. Kelly claims that Jay-Z has someone brandish a firearm and take aim at him IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHOW! In the words of DMX, “another unsolved mystery, going down in history.”

MC Hammer – Active Duty: Now a rapper of MC Hammer‘s lyrically impaired status who achieved commercial success in their day should NEVER attempt a “comeback” in a different era. Apparently, MC Hammer didn’t get that memo. Apparently, no one’s ever sent that memo to MC Hammer because this album came out in 2001 and here it is 2011 and he’s STILL trying to be relevant in a time period where the average buyer wasn’t even born when he was relevant. And those of us who were simply don’t give a damn. If this was “Active Duty” I’d hate to see what a dishonorable discharge is. Probably a little something like this.

Jay-Z – Kingdom Come: Alright all of these Jay-Z references, while it’s no secret I’m far from his biggest fan, are purely coincidental. That or this guy has been a part of some of the worst audible pieces of shit that have been made over the past 10 years (I count four, three of which are on this list). At this point, it’s safe to say that his “retirement” was a marketing ploy. There’s no part of me that believes that The Black Album was ever meant to be Jay-Z‘s last album. I’ll never believe it. Why? Because he’s three more albums in, only one worth listening to, and has a brand new label and multi-album contract.

Swizz Beatz – One Man Band Man: If you guess that nothing about the concept of this album sounds like something that would be audible, you’re right. This album was so bad that the videos were pieces of shit. Then you realize that Swizz didn’t even stick to his own concept of “one man bad” on his track 12 disappointment with SIX of them produced by others and another that was co-produced with two other producers. And then he had six guest appearances over four tracks. Someone please tell Swizz Beatz to go away.

Common – Universal Mind Control: There’s no secret that Pharrell is the BANE of my existence. I realize that’s a very unpopular stance but it is what it is. Without Chad, Pharrell is a musical pile of… nevermind. With Pharrell & The Neptunes it’s either really good or really bad. No in-between. I’ll elude to this point. Listen to In My Mind and if that album is for you then this blog probably isn’t is all I’ll say. NEVERTHELESS, Common teams up with Pharrell and together they release one of the biggest pieces of crap I’ve heard. The album was on sale for a dollar at one point, right? Yeah, I didn’t buy it. I saved my dollar for someone’s low-cost food menu. This isn’t a knock on Common as he’s still one of the best to do it but this album sucked royally. Everything about it sucked. Let’s hope Common leaves his commercialism aspirations where most of us left this album – in the recycle bin.

The following albums, people, and trends listed below compiled so much bad music in the past decade it was no way I could single out ALL of it…

Every Fabolous album ever made: Get real if you think this man knows how to make an album.
Plies: His explanation of how he chose his stage name and it meaning, “shit we use in the hood to pull things out of shit,” should let you know everything you need to know about him as a person.
Yung Berg: Instead of stealing his chains, why don’t someone steal his career and do us all a favor.
Soulja Boy: It’s rappers like this that make you, a) embarrassed to be of the same race as he is (see his comments about slavery) and, b) makes you hate the evolution of technology.
Nelly’s entire career: The fact that on his first album he said, “I got a thing for corn rows and manicured toes,” lets you know the caliber of suck you’re dealing with from the jump.
Black Eyed Peas continued existence: Seriously, how much longer can this suckfest last?
Chingy: From 2003-2007, on a pretty much consistent basis, this suckass bastard has been musically tormenting us.
All Ludacris albums not named Back For The First Time: Each Luda album has gotten so progressively bad to the point where, well, just listen to Battle Of The Sexes.
Anything Jermaine Dupri thinks about doing: Pretty self-explanatory. I hope he reads this.
Ron Browz’s life: How do you go from “Ether” to Etherlibrium? SMH
Nick Cannon’s existence: SMH. Die slow.
Any and all cable reality TV show albums: I’m looking directly at you, Diddy.
Anything Gwen Stefani’s affiliated with: It’s B-A-N-A-N-A-S how much she completely SUCKS!
LL Cool J’s career post 1993: Yeah, some of that doesn’t fall within 2000-2010 but it still deserves to be mentioned.
Anything spawning from the St. Lunatics: If you can name me ONE good song any of them have done, collectively or individually, then click off of this website immediately.

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And the guestlist of people in attendance was even better. Everyone from Xzibit to Elliot Wilson of RapRadar.com. Even porn stars Mya G and Stacie Lane were in attendance!

Shout out to my homie Pat Deegan for locating this amateur-shot, YouTube footage of the show!

B.o.B. performs “Nothing On You.”

B.o.B. and Eminem perform “Airplanes.”

Jay-Z brings out Young Jeezy.

Jay-Z shouting out Proof, leading into “Hard Knock Life.”

Jay-Z & Eminem performing “Renegade.”

Jay-Z performs “Free Mason.”

Eminem & Trick Trick performing “Welcome 2 Detroit.”

Eminem & 50 Cent perform “Patiently Waiting.”

Eminem brings out Drake for “Forever.”

Eminem brings out Dr. Dre.

Eminem & Dr. Dre on stage, Mr. Porter starts the crowd on a “Detox” chant.

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Dear Drake,

Be a mediocre rapper or a half-assed singer but you can’t be both.

Signed,
My f*cking ears

Leave it to Drake to perfectly sum up how I felt about this album.

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In Chicago, at a Hustle Simmons show featuring Big Sean, an artist who wasn’t allowed to do his set got on stage and Kanye’d Big Sean.

I’ll stop for a second to let you digest the irony, and comedy, of that situation…

After this unfortunate fool snatched the mic out of Big Sean’s hand, he said, “F*ck Chicago. F*ck everyone in this b*tch,” and rocket launched the microphone to the ceiling… then Hustle Simmons hit him with a Chris Benoit reverse German Suplex from the stage to the ground -what seemed to be about a good six foot drop.

The best part? IT WAS ALL CAPTURED ON VIDEO FOR OUR AMUSEMENT!!!!

And if that wasn’t enough drama for you, let’s come back home to Detroit… Detroit: Where the movie, “Janky Promoters,” should have been filmed and based off.

Chip Tha Ripper was SCHEDULED to perform in Detroit last night, at Bert’s Warehouse. THAT’S where it seems that the Tom F*ckery started. I won’t go in about my brief encounters with Chips team (missed an interview w/no call, got a TEXT the NEXT day to set another one up, only to miss that one… it’s been a week now, no one’s even bothered to contact us still – if only to apologize for missing our scheduled interview), but this extreme fail isn’t accredited to Chip or his people.

The show, which I posted a Ro Spit promo vid about a couple weeks ago, featured performances from DOPE acts such as: Selfmeyi, PL, and Ro Spit – with Chip scheduled as the headliner. I won’t even get into how askew charging $20 for a show where Chip is headlining in Detroit is, but when the price is inflated even higher than advertised at the door? The DJ is two hours late, then cussed out on stage, then fussed out on Twitter in PUBLIC by the promoter? There’s a MANDATORY coat check of $3? But you can still wear your coat if you pay the $3?

That’s just the tip of the iceberg! I’ll say this: CONCERT’S CAN NOT BE PROMOTED LIKE CLUB/PARTY EVENTS!

I’ll let the homegirl, Alex Washington, fill you in on the specifics:

And Motivation Boutique in Ann Arbor fills in anything that Alex may have missed.

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